10 TIPS ON HOW NOT TO TALK TO YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX
(Revised Edition)
Parents often ask me how to talk to their kids about sex. It's such a big, uncomfortable topic, and how do we know if we've said too much? That discussion may also look different to each family as they consider the special needs and circumstances of their individual children.
The "what" and "how" to communicate is up tp you, but I can give you tips on what NOT to say to your children. This is a wonderful resource for parents seeking to keep the innocence of their children as long as possible and educate them on God's powerful, loving plan of purity.
Stay tuned for my next book talking to teens!
10 Tips was edited by Lee Desmond who edited “Every Women’s Battle” & believes this book is more powerful! My good friend Anne Marie Ezzo was gracious enough to write the forward. She is he co-author of “Growing Kids God’s Way” & “Babywise” and co-founder of Growing Families International which is in 95 countries.
Book recommendations by:
Dr. Dennis Frey, President of Master’s International University of Divinity
Eunice Ray, founder of RSVP America (Restoring Social Virtue and Purity to America)
Thelma Wells, author, speaker at the” Women of Faith” conference
Pastor Mark Cutler, pastor at Trinity Lutheran Church, Kalispell, MT
Col. Ron Ray, ret. USMC, lawyer, author, former Asst. to the Sec. of Defense under Reagan.
For your convenience, Amazon offers both hard copies and kindle downloads.
NEW INTRODUCTION
October 2001, God was opening up a brand new mission for me. Amazingly I found myself in a security check line at O’ Hare airport for a day trip; destination Des Moines, Iowa. I was to meet up with a ministry partner, who was instrumental in setting up a long awaited audience with a publishing company. This would provide an opportunity to present an important message. The information I was providing could potentially have a far reaching generational impact.
Flying post Sept 11, 2001 security was high, lines were long, and the wait even longer. Reading Ezekiel 33 while waiting in line, as an assignment from Col. Ron Ray, former Assistant to the Secretary of Defense under President Reagan, I knew the stakes were high. This chapter would prepare me for my current mission and it was to become my marching orders, as “one who warns…a watchman on the wall.”
What was the mission? To unveil the lies at the foundation of the sex education series; Learning About Sex. This material, published by the Lutheran Publishing company, was not based on fact but fiction. In addition, it had been instrumental in setting the trajectory for Christian sex education over the last 30 years, creating a situation where their publications and policy, based on deceit, had negatively influenced 3 decades of children. They needed to hear the truth in order to prevent another 3 decades of harm.
This is not where I envisioned myself when this journey began 4 years earlier. My journey began as a simple request to teach purity at our local private Christian school. Privileged to be raised in a solid Christian home, attend Christian schools, I knew my calling was to become a nurse and I would spend years working in the field of public health. In God’s perfect timing, I married a solid, loving man who was a Youth and then Family Life Minister in the Lutheran Church. To our amazement, in both of our professions, we saw more abortion, teen pregnancy, pornography, sexually transmitted disease and even prostitution among church youth than we were prepared for. Causing us to scratch our heads and ask, “Whatever happened to chastity and purity?” What hope was there for our children and their peers?
On that morning back in October 2001; a wife, now a mom and former public health nurse, headed to the Lutheran’s for Life headquarters to make a presentation and a plea. Armed with documents that would do well as a Supreme Court brief, an appeal was made to this publishing company; “Please pull your sex education curriculum. You are in error, and are publishing lies that are harming children, please wake up and hear the truth.” Concerned for integrity in the Church, I left them with 4 action points that included removal of the sex education series and develop a program that promotes chastity and purity. Without change, what future would there be for my children? This also begged the question: What information did they use to develop their Learning about Sex, series?
Uncertain of their sources, I was challenged to dig deep and then even deeper in answer to these questions. My digging brought me to an organization called SIECUS (Sex Information Education Council of the United States). This council’s research led me to the work of Alfred Kinsey; his work referred to as “science” clearly was not. This was like no science I studied in Public Health or nursing. Despite the unwillingness of Lutheran leaders to hear about the lies and deception in their sex education curriculum, God continued to put me in situations where the credibility of my research could be shared.
This book is my attempt, with an army of courageous men and women standing behind me, to get the truth into the church and into the hands of moms and dads within the church. Matthew 18:15-17 states, “If your brother sins, go to him, if he does not listen, take another with you, and if he still doesn’t listen take it to the church.” The Matthew XVIII ministry is dedicated to assisting parents in their ability to discern between the beauty of God’s design for intimacy and the deadly lies that permeate our culture. My prayer is that as you read this book, you too will discern proper applications and knowledgeably instruct your children.
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING
"Exposes the leftist agenda of using "sex-ed" to sexualize young people and up-end society! You need to read this book!! This will open your eyes to the long time agenda of the Left's sexual march through the institutions to sexualize young people, destroy the Judeo-Christian worldview that birthed this country, and accrue more political power along the way! Time to wake up!"
- Seth Gruber, CEO of The White Rose Resistance and Host of "Unaborted" Podcast, July 2022
“I wish I had been able to study the information in this powerful, positive, palatable book years ago when I was raising my children. It would have reduced me and my husband’s stress talking about the sensitive subject of sex. But, it’s not too late for our grandchildren. Take the embarrassment and stress out of this necessary task! Read this book and see how positive it is to talk about this subject God’s way.”
-Dr. Thelma Wells, Founder of A Woman of God Ministries and Generation Love-Divine Explosion, Speaker, Author, Professor, TV Host (NRB & TBN Television), 2022
"In this book, Audrey Werner uses the words “purity” and “pure” more than sixty times. Her theme reflects the core Biblical standard for living the highest, wisest, most satisfying, and ennobling life possible. That is the kind of life loving parents want for their children. It is the kind of life the Heavenly Father wants for His children."
Purity of body, mind and spirit are the core components of an ennobling existence. For most young people, the body gets far more attention than the mind or the spirit – it’s a fact of human existence. It stands to reason that maintaining purity of the body during one’s youth is mostly focused on sexuality. The outcome of that focus has the greatest impact on the development of the mind and spirit.
What you will learn about sexual purity by reading this book may very well change your entire understanding of what the Psalmist meant when he addressed youth’s most critical challenge - "How can a young man [person] keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Your word" (Psalm 119:9)."
-Dennis D. Frey, Th.D., President - Master’s International University of Divinity, 2022
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BOOK FOREWORD
As parents and educators, it’s important to understand that “sexual knowledge” is not innocent knowledge, because sexual knowledge cannot be separated from moral knowledge that regulates human emotions and responses.
Every child has the right to live in a safe world where he or she is not assaulted physically, emotionally, sexually or morally. A world where a child is not taken advantage of or over-powered and forced to accept unsolicited teaching regarding his or her sexuality.
But how do we protect children from intrusive, uninvited, inappropriate forces that can injure their emotional and moral capacities? Who determines what is inappropriate, what is good, reasonable, protective and what crosses the line? What can and should parents be doing at home to protect and prepare their children for the moral and sexual onslaught prevalent in our current society, without robbing their children of their innocence? Or, as the current generation of parents are being told, “leave it to the professionals and we’ll provide your children comprehensive sex education classes in the comfort of their classroom.”
Because of the subject matter, many parents are all too willing to abdicate their position of primary teacher and influencer of their children. They believe the lie that the “experts” have a better way and therefore release their children to hear information that introduces them to vocabulary, concepts about their sexual identity, that a previous generation couldn’t have dreamed of or even knew the meanings of half of what is being taught to today’s children as “fact”.
While parents in the 21st century are attempting to process all these changes regarding our sexuality, most are completely unaware of where this whole “sex ed” thing began. After all, it would have been during their parents’ youth, starting back in 1964 that the idea of Sex Education was introduced into the public sector. Information based on research by a Dr. Alfred Kinsey. It was his scientific “studies” that provided a new view of sexuality outside the context of marriage and children. Prior to Kinsey, writings that reflected the American notion of human sexuality were presented as, “God’s Life Process” or the “Marital Act” and everything else was known as “Carnal Knowledge.” We went from viewing man as an individual created in the image of God, with dignity and what we call Biblical anthropological context, to viewing man as part of Zoology, just higher up in the animal kingdom.
So, we ask, “How can we teach our children a biblical view of sexuality, when from a very early age they are saturated with details and images that constantly challenge the very concept of biblical purity?” Before that question can be answered, parents and educators need to understand how we got here and then what we can do about it. That is what Audrey Werner is presenting in 10 Tips on How NOT to Talk to Your Kids about Sex.
Within the pages of this book Audrey shares not only her own journey of discovery about the foundations of the current sex education movement, but also the agenda behind it. As you read Audrey’s systematic and logical progression, the evidence becomes overwhelming that America is on the wrong track when it comes to Sex Education. Your emotions may go between, anger at being duped by the “experts” to helplessness in thinking “but how can I make a difference and what can be done now?!” Well, if enough of us join Audrey, and others, in this battle we can make a difference. Audrey herself has said “who am I? I’m just a mom”. Well, there is nothing like waking up the “Mama bear” in every Mom who finds out her precious children’s innocence is being violated all under the guise of “education”.
Audrey Werner, RN, B.S.N., M.A. and MOM, decided to make a difference, and as one ordinary person began her quest for Truth. Within 10 Tips on How NOT to talk to Your Kids about Sex, she will expose the darkness presented through Kinsey’s fraudulent science that has found its way into Christian sex education materials and then inspire you as a parent and educator to return to sharing with children about God’s life process in a modest, biblical way. As a parent educator for over thirty years, I am confident that this will be one of those books that will be life changing for you, your children and yes, even your grand-children.
For such a time as this we are living and can make a difference.
Anne Marie Ezzo
Author and Co-Founder of Growing Families International